i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Randomize
