how do flat chested girls get laid?
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
