i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
