I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize