i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Randomize
