butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
