Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
That accounts for only three of the penises
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
