I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
