Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
