no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Randomize
