sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Randomize
