Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
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