You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
being pregnant is like rehab
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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