How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
