That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
