Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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