Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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