I hope mine doesn't look like that
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
