I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
