plz talk dirty to me
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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