My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
