Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Randomize
