once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize