he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
