I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
