Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
