you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Randomize