similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
