I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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