is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize