I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
