I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
