hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Randomize
