He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
