Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
