How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
