so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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