I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
