R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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