I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
