I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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