ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I need to calm my uterus...
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
