He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
