Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Who wears a wallet chain?!
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
