porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
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