oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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