I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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