I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize