coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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