How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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